Hiking Hoyt

Rachel and Josh have an amazing love story and so much of their story includes camping and nature. I absolutely had to include this in their engagement shoot!

Rachel and Josh met at camp many years ago, but were both dating other people. After graduating college Rachel decided to thru hike the Appalachian Trail with a friend. During the year of planning before she left for the trail she was reunited with Josh and they started dating. Josh, knowing that Rachel would be away from home for six months to hike the trail, was nothing but supportive. He helped her plan for the trip including writing sweet notes for her to read throughout her travels. He flew in to meet her along the trail and they ended up staying at an adorable bed and breakfast.

After six months of hiking the AT, Rachel came home to Josh. Within the month he proposed - while they were out hiking together on a nature trail. 

For this session I made a cute pop up tent for the couple to lounge in during our session. We found a pine tree farm and set up camp. Our little handmade tent was set up on a quilt that belongs to Rachel's grandmother. The two of them laughed and cuddled the entire time. 

In less than a month Rachel and Josh are getting married this summer at the very same bed and breakfast they stayed in along the Appalachian Trial.

The Elephant In the Room

OK. Let's talk about my weight. Yep - I'm going there. 

Don't worry, the title of this blog does NOT refer to me as the elephant. That's self deprecating and self deprecation is unattractive. I'm not unattractive. ;)

The elephant in the room is letting my weight control me.

Since getting married I've gained weight. Not some weight -  a lot of weight. I'm in a place where I don't feel like myself. I feel like the real me is trapped under 50 unnecessary pounds. There's a disconnect that I don't like. I'm working really hard to lose that weight and I've lost 10 pounds so far! I have complete faith that if I continue my hard work I'll be back where I want to be.

So what is this post about?

Does your weight sometimes control you?

As a photographer I often hear that a client wants to wait to have their photos taken until they lose some weight. Or maybe during the shoot they want to see the back of the camera to see if they look fat. I always, always, always look at the client and think WHY? You look great! Your concern is unnecessary. I always think it's so silly that a client would put their engagement photos on hold based solely on their body weight.

And then I realize I'm a terrible hypocrite. 

In the last two years since I put on those pesky pounds - I've waited. I've put parts of my life on hold because I want to lose weight first before doing this or that. I don't want to take this trip yet because I want to be skinnier on vacation. So I don't go. I don't want to go out with friends this weekend because I feel fat. So I stay home and don't enjoy time with people I love. I haven't had ANY photos taken of me and Kyle since our wedding because I want to lose weight before doing a family photo shoot. Wait... isn't that what I just... oh, I see...

I DO IT TOO! And it's permeated every aspect of my life, including my business. I didn't have a headshot on my website until just recently because I didn't want my clients to see what I weigh (like they wouldn't be seeing me in person at our shoot?). I haven't posted any photos of myself to my Instagram or Facebook because I want to lose 50 pounds first. Well guess what. Losing 50 pounds takes time and I'm not going to continue to put life on the back burner until I can reach my ideal weight. 

The point? You shouldn't either. 

Whatever it is you're waiting on - STOP. Stop waiting and start doing.

During your engagement or wedding photos let's not worry about weight! Let's just document your happiness, your love, your relationship. Nobody else thinks you look fat. If YOU can stop thinking you look fat then you can go from having an uncomfortable photo shoot full of second guessing yourself to having a beautiful photo shoot that expresses your genuine joy in the moment. Doesn't that sound like a better idea? Let's do that instead.

I've decided not to give people advice I refuse to take. So here we are. This is me. No edits, no photoshopping, no tricks.

The Stephanie Benge Story

As mentioned in an earlier blog post, I'm interested in not only telling my client's stories, but telling my clients MY stories. 

I guess a good place to start is the story of how I became Stephanie Benge Photography.

Well, to be honest, photographer is the only thing that I ever wanted to be for more than just a few moments in time. When I was in fourth grade and really liked my fourth grade teacher I wanted to be a teacher. Except that I don't actually like kids, or teaching, or anything that teachers have to do. So that was short lived. For a while in middle school I wanted to be a lawyer, but I feel pretty strongly that this phase in my life was a direct result of the movie Legally Blonde and not founded in any kind of reality about lawyering. Later in middle school I fell in love with American history. I still love history, but I don't want to be a history teacher, a historian, a historical writer, or a politician. In high school my favorite subject was band. Yes, I was a band geek. I thought for a long time my career was bound to be tied up in that. But I don't want to be a band director (again, that's teaching), and professional saxophonists aren't really a think unless you're Kenny G. And who wants to be Kenny G? Nobody. Not even Kenny G, probably. 

What I wanted from my job was the ability to be my own boss and make my own hours. I wanted to do something that I personally cared about rather than doing a job just to be doing a job. I wanted to be able to sit behind a computer (you're looking at a serious introvert here), but also provide a customer service and interact with cool people when I wasn't busy introverting.

Right when this realization was hitting me I met Amanda. Amanda had just graduated from college and started a photography business. I thought to myself - that's a think I could do! I have always loved taking photos, though they were never professional level. Amanda took me along to a couple of weddings and taught me a bit about how to use my camera - and I was hooked! After the first wedding with her I thought YES. THIS IS MY THING. I did my first solo wedding later that year and I've been chasing down that dream ever since.

I was still in college for several years after that first solo wedding, so I focused on my school work rather than my business. Immediately after graduating college I didn't have enough wedding work to make that my only income. It wasn't until just recently that I was able to make photography my FULL TIME job. 

I guess my message to you is to find a passion, not a job. What's the thing you really LOVE to do? What's the thing that clicks YES, THIS IS MY THING? No matter what you have to do to chase that - chase it. This is your real, one-and-only life. You should be doing what you love. I am. :)