Wedding Advice - Where to spend your money

One thing I love about being a wedding photographer is that I have been an asset to my friends when it came time to plan their weddings. Every time someone I know gets engaged they come to me asking my advice, which if you don't know me I LOVE to give advice. :) There are definitely some patterns I've noticed in my time as a wedding photographer that I think would be useful to someone currently planning a wedding. I wanted to share some of those with you today. Today's theme is where to spend your money (and where NOT to). I hope you can gain something from the experiences of your friendly neighborhood wedding photographer. 

1. DO spend money on a good wedding photographer.
(I know a good one if you're looking)

Yeah, I said it. You should allocate a good portion of your wedding budget to photography. Your wedding photos are the only thing that remain after your big day is over. Yes, you might keep your wedding dress, but you most likely will not ever wear it again. It will go in a preservation box and remain there for years and years. Yes, you will keep a portion of your cake to eat on your one year anniversary, but after that anniversary your cake is gone.

The one thing that you can keep and interact with on a daily basis for the rest of your life is your PHOTOS. These are the most tangible reminder of your wedding day. It's the best way to share with others who couldn't be in attendance. It's the best way to share with generations to come. It's the best way to ensure that your wedding day memories are secure.

Speaking as a former bride, there are a lot of things about your wedding day that you will forget about or miss entirely because the day is so busy and packed with emotions. If you have a great wedding photographer you will have wedding photos that tell your full wedding story so that you can remember fondly everything that happened on your special day.

2. DO spend money on a good venue.

I feel that this is often overlooked. Many brides who are working with a tight budget decide to save themselves money by choosing a cheap venue. A cheap venue is great, an UGLY venue is not. So often I find that brides who were trying to save money on a venue ended up spending even more money on decorations to try and make an ugly venue look better.

Save yourself this time, effort, and money and just pick a venue that is naturally beautiful. This means you will need to spend less money on decorations and less time beautifying.

I personally feel that it takes too much time and effort to try and make a recreation center gymnasium look beautiful, and usually these attempts are rather unsuccessful. It doesn't matter how many lights you drape. I can still tell that I'm in a rec center gymnasium. Do yourself AND your wedding photos a favor and find a naturally beautiful site for your wedding.

If you are working with a tight budget and don't want to spend a ton of money on an expensive venue I would encourage you to talk to family and friends and see if anyone has some pretty land that they own. Backyard weddings are beautiful and very affordable!

3. DO spend money on your reception over your ceremony.

In most cases your guests will spend 30 minutes or less at your ceremony. They could spend hours at your reception. At your ceremony the guests focus is all on you. The only area I would say you really need to concern yourself with is the place where you will be standing.

At the receptions guests will be wandering, looking around the whole space instead of just toward the front. The reception is where it is important to leave a good impression and make your guests time there enjoyable. 

4. DON'T spend money on your ceremony programs.

Don't get me wrong, your programs should look nice. I'm a graphic designer so I would certainly never advocate having tacky programs. That being said, people WILL throw these away. They will. I hate to be the one to tell you that if you had higher hopes for the future of your wedding programs. Unfortunately, 99% of your programs end up in program heaven immediately after the shindig is over.

I would recommend having a classy program design and getting them printed as cheap as possible. Or, you could do a chalkboard program or something along that vein so that you aren't wasting paper at all. It's cheaper AND nice to nature. Win, win. 

5. DON'T spend money on decorations that you will never use for anything else.

This leads back up to our first point of having a beautiful venue. If you have a beautiful venue you will need to buy fewer decoration items. You will still need to decorate somehow.

My recommendation is to decorate with things that you will be able to use in your home, or use a lot of flowers. Flowers are classy, timeless, beautiful, and after the wedding is over you don't have to find somewhere to store them or try and sell them on Etsy. Send a vase of flowers home with your bridesmaids and you're done. I think you're doing yourself a favor by not purchasing a vintage birdcage to go on every single table because then you are the owner of 50 vintage birdcages. What does one do with 50 vintage birdcages, exactly? Nothing. One does nothing.

Also don't do this because that trend is dead. Anyway, that's another blog post entirely. The point is, brides can rack up a ton of money spent on reception table decor that they have no interest in using in the future. If you have a very specific idea in mind for your reception and don't want to purchase those items, RENT them. It's a lot easier than having a closet full of identical centerpieces that you can't get rid of.

I hope that was helpful! Look forward to more wedding planning posts. Be sure to comment and leave me your thoughts!

Jessica & Alex - Savannah, TN Wedding

Back in June I was blessed to be with Jessica and Alex on their wedding day. Can you believe these two have been together for 12 years! That's amazing. Their wedding was so special and so much fun. I could tell how loved these two are by their friends and family. The ceremony was beautiful and the reception was absolutely so much fun. Thank you Jessica and Alex for allowing me to share in your day!

Jessica was such a beautiful bride!

I'd never seen this before, but it's a GREAT idea. BUG SPRAY! I'm so, so thankful to the Seatons for supplying bug spray. As a person who has a real issue with mosquitoes it was great to be able to use provided bug spray and not leave with a thousand bites. Awesome idea. 

I have NO idea what is happening in this photo, but I thought it really captured a moment. So here it is. Someone please tell me what's going on here haha.

Chris & Arianne - Henderson, TN Wedding

It was SUCH an honor to be involved in Chris and Arianne's wedding back in June. It was such a beautiful gathering full of incredible details and wonderful people. The wedding was held at the home of one of their friends (my friends too) that used to be an old plantation house. The Noles home has a beautiful yard, perfect for a wedding. Almost everyone I knew was involved in this wedding somehow. All the ladies from church were involved with decorating, planning, setting up, etc. All of the little kids from church were involved as flower tossers, a job which they took very seriously. It was great to be a photographer at a wedding where I knew almost everybody. That rarely happens for me!

Chris and Arianne have such a great love story and a wonderful wedding day story. I hope that I captured their story well and can share a little bit of it with you today.

One of my favorite parts about any wedding is the flowers. I look forward to seeing what kind of flowers each bride will have! A good bouquet can really make a wedding for me. Well guess what - Arianne is as obsessed with flowers as I am! Seriously - this is the most fresh flowers I've seen in one place EVER... and it was glorious. Just glorious. 

Oh, don't worry. I took like forty different photos of her bouquet. Here are a few. 

Beautiful, right? Told you. 

As wedding favors Chris and Arianne gave flower seeds for the guests to take home and grow. I love it!

Henderson TN Wedding
Henderson TN Wedding
Henderson, TN Wedding
Henderson, TN Wedding
Henderson, TN Wedding
Henderson, TN Wedding
Henderson, TN Wedding
Henderson, TN Wedding

The Noles house was full of people all day. It was both chaotic and lovely. The children found ways to entertain themselves with music, games, and books.

Henderson, TN Wedding
Henderson, TN Wedding
Henderson, TN Wedding
Henderson, TN Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding

Arianne made a BEAUTIFUL bride.

West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding

This wedding ceremony was definitely the most intimate wedding ceremony I've ever witnessed - and I've been to a few weddings. It was so honest, open, beautiful.

West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding

The wedding started with a time of worshipping God!

West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding

Joe began the ceremony talking about how God molds us like clay and creates beauty from our lives. After he spoke Chris and Arianne told their own versions of their love story to each other, and Arianne's twin sister Jennalyn created a clay sculpture for the couple.

West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding

Here the couple was told to look out at the crowd of their loved ones and soak it all in. So often people bustle through their wedding day so fast they can't even remember it. (By the way - that's what I'm for!). I'm glad Chris and Arianne took time to be the in the moment.

West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding

The moment right after the bride and groom walk back up the aisle is one of my very favorite moments because memories like THIS happen!

West Tennessee Wedding

Hug from mom + group hug with mom and sisters!

West Tennessee Wedding

I loved this kids table!

West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding

After cutting the cake Rebecca, a friend of the couple, performed a song for them. Then they shared their first dance to another song Rebecca performed.

West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding

If I had to choose a word to describe this wedding it would definitely be "whimsical". Seen here by the flower girls encircling the dancing couple. Pretty much the whole evening had this vibe. Whimsy and love.

West Tennessee Wedding

Chris had written a song to Arianne for their wedding. He performed the song for all of us and it was super sweet!

West Tennessee Wedding

After Chris performed his song he invited all of their musically inclined friends to come up and surprise Arianne. It was so awesome! I've never seen this happen at a wedding and it was really cool. Everyone just brought whatever instrument they could play and joined in. 

West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding

There were many great aspects of this wedding, but my favorite was that Chris and Arianne are STUPID in love. Like so, so, so in love. It was obvious and radiating that they absolutely ADORE each other. You'll see what I mean...

West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding
West Tennessee Wedding

This is Zachary. This is not his love story, but he is really cute. He's about to be a big brother too!

Also, this is by far the longest blog post I've ever done! You're welcome. Or I'm sorry. Either one. :)

West Tennessee Wedding

Kelli & Josh - Chattanooga, TN Wedding

Back in May I was blessed to be able to document this awesome couple's wedding day. Josh and Kelli are both such sweet people and it was great to be with them on their wedding! July 4th is a special day for the two of them, so I really tried to get this post done yesterday as a little gift to them. I tried but just couldn't make it happen! Here it is though, a day late, in honor of their (dating) anniversary. Happy Fourth of July and may you have many more together!

WEBB10.jpg
WEBB12.jpg

Josh didn't want to see Kelli before the ceremony, but Kelli always fixes Josh's hair because apparently it can be unruly. We thought it would be cute to get a photo of her fixing his hair, even though he still didn't see her. I thought it was pretty cute.

One of the bridesmaids doing a little pre ceremony nail polishing.

Above are the pennants that were hanging on the windows surrounding the entire sanctuary. I had never seen this idea and I thought it was so great! What a cool decoration idea!

Look how happy they are!

Since we were in Chattanooga we of course went to the famous bridge! What we didn't know is that Relay For Life was taking place that weekend and there were thousands of people on the bridge and in the park below for the event. The couple and I miscommunicated and they ended up parking on a different side of the bridge than I did and walked the entire length of the bridge to find me! Oops. It was nice though, because we had live music and an audience while we did our shoot!

I really prefer to do a first look and get all of the photos of the couple out of the way before the ceremony. However, a couple's wedding should be exactly what THEY want it to be, and these two didn't want to see each other before. Instead of cutting into their reception time, we met somewhere after the entire event was over. One really nice thing about doing it this way is that there's no schedule to worry about! The wedding is over, we can relax. I feel like this shoot with Kelli and Josh was so relaxed and flexible because they didn't have anything to worry about! And they were already married, so they were in a pretty good mood. :) 

THIS LIGHT THOUGH. Another great thing about doing photos after this particular wedding is that it was the PERFECT time of day. This is not always the case, but for these two we managed to time it perfectly. Check that light... 

As I said, we had live music. At one point these two broke out doing the Stanky Leg. So naturally, I grabbed a photo of it.

Alex & Andrew - Cullman, Alabama Wedding

Back in May I was honored to document Alex and Andrew's love story. Alex was my suite mate for a semester in college, though we knew each other before that. I was SO excited when Alex contacted me about wedding photography. She's so pretty and has great taste so I knew she'd have an incredible wedding. What I learned from rooming with Alex in college is that she has adorable taste, she's really good at math, she keeps her room really clean, and she loves Pretty Little Liars (don't we all). 

I didn't meet Andrew until we shot engagement photos (which you can view here: http://www.stephaniebengephotography.com/blog/2015/2/1/alex-andrew-nashville-engagement). When I met him I immediately liked Andrew. Andrew is really nice, likes his shirts well ironed, and takes a long time fixing his hair. 

It was such a pleasure spending time with these two, and with everyone else involved in making their special day happen. It was such a beautiful wedding and I'm excited to share it with you!

dann02.jpg

Adults color too.

Alex's first look with her bridesmaids.

First look with her dad.

First look with her man.

The bride and groom had some family friends who have the MOST BEAUTIFUL house. It took about 15 minutes just to walk around it and scope out photo spots. I couldn't even handle it. I'm so glad we were able to take a little trip out here because it was definitely some gorgeous scenery.

I'm not sure what the technical name for these little treats are, but they were incredible. They're like mini sweet potato pies. I ate way too many and I've decided I want to be buried alive in a pile of these little things and eat my way out.

The bride and groom dancing to Time of My Life. It was amazing.

This little guy was a real party animal, let me tell you. I couldn't get him to chill out.

Alex and Andrew hired an awesome band! They were so much fun and very entertaining.

Alex and Andrew are definitely the kind of folks who love to dance. Their first dance was amazing and choreographed perfectly. They had so much fun at the reception and it was obvious to me how much they enjoyed themselves. 

I'm so glad I caught this amazing moment (completely unintentionally by the way). Alex and Andrew were mid dance-off and I was snapping away. I didn't see this until I started editing. That woman behind Andrew with the look of horror on her face is his mother. This moment is my favorite.

Thanks to everyone who made Alex and Andrew's special day possible!

VENDORS:
Hair/Make UP: Jenna Nelson and Andrea Barnett with Salon Luxe
Ceremony: Cullman Church of Christ
Reception Site and Catering: TP Country Club
Cakes: Barnett Bakery
Band: The Flashbacks Showband
Wedding Dress Designer: Jason Alexander
Wedding Dress Shop: Something Blue - Hartselle, AL
Bridesmaid's Dresses: Bridesmaids, Inc.
Menswear: Jos. A. Bank